Issue #008 — Bubble-bands, Butt-dials and Better Briefs

Bennett Green

Oct 30, 2020

Better Brief Writing

I believe that writing well is a superpower. It's one of the reasons I enjoy preparing this newsletter - it gives me an opportunity to practice writing and (hopefully) I get a tiny bit better each issue.

So I particularly enjoyed this sarcastic article on how to draft judicial submissions. It has some excellent tips on persuasive writing. For example:

Don't Give Away the Surprise Ending: Briefs are like mystery novels -- you don't want to ruin the suspense by revealing the surprise ending too early. Use the first 34 pages of your brief to lay out the most complicated legal puzzle imaginable. Only after you have completed befuddled the other side (and the judge as well) should you play your ace in the hole. "In any event, this is all academic because [fill in the blank]." The judge will be awed by your legal tour de force.

I loved the article so much I actually did some googling to read about the judge that wrote it. Sadly, he died in 2011. He sounds like an excellent lawyer and judge, though, and I'm glad I stumbled upon his tips. Highly recommended.

Tips for Better Brief Writing and Oral Argument

(via Stew Fortier)

Socially Distanced Concerts

The Flaming Lips' habit of performing a few songs safely ensconced inside plastic bubbles is really paying off for them. Watch them perform one of their songs on the Late Show with both them and the audience rocking out inside large super-monkey-balls.

The Flaming Lips "Race for the Prize"

Couldn't Care Less

I love David Mitchell. I find his angry logic to be consistently hilarious. And so I was delighted to stumble upon this video, where he attacks the use of the phrase 'I could care less' - something that has never made sense to me but I've never had the confidence to call someone out on its usage. I will now!

Dear America ... | David Mitchell's SoapBox

How's Your 4G?

I recently got so fed up with Telstra ('effing Telstra) I swapped over to some other cheap mobile provider. It's not great - but it costs less than a third of what I was paying before.

The thing is, as annoying as Telstra are (and yeah - they're really, really annoying), their coverage is pretty good. And my new provider's coverage isn't.

So, as I was cursing my 3G speeds and reminiscing about playing snake on my old 3310, you can imagine how great it felt to read that NASA is putting 4G mobile coverage on the 'effing Moon!

Nokia said its 4G network will allow astronauts to carry out a number of activities including making voice and video calls, sending important data and deploying payloads. It plans to eventually launch 5G on the moon as well.

NASA is launching a 4G mobile network on the moon.

Butt-Upgrade

While we're living in the future, how's this story about a guy who managed to 'butt-dial' his Tesla and authorise the purchase of a $4,200 upgrade. Awkward.

On September 24th, physician Dr Ali Vaziri was unpleasantly surprised by a mobile alert from his bank, which said he had just purchased a $4,280 upgrade for his Tesla Model 3. The large transaction, he quickly surmised, was a "butt dial" or accidental purchase made through the Tesla app on his phone.

Tesla owner says he butt-dialed a $4,280 Autopilot upgrade - and is still waiting on a refund

Thanks so much for reading.

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Bennett.

(Top Photo by Matthew T Rader on Unsplash)